Sandra Paterson: My daughter missing dad

NZ Herald Jul 03, 2004 (and still applies today)
My daughter was about 2 1/2 when she looked up halfway through her porridge one day and asked, “Why don’t I have a daddy at home, like Steven does?” Steven is the boy next door, and I am a single parent.
…Just a mum or just a dad simply doesn’t cut it from a kid’s point of view. And two mums or two dads wouldn’t, either. The main problem with same-sex matrimony – be it by civil union or any other label – is that it legitimises same-sex parenting. The issue is not whether gay couples can love and care for each other or be loving parents. Of course they can. It’s whether two men or two women can give kids what they really need. Two gay dads can’t make up for not having a mum around; and neither can the very best lesbian mothers make up for missing out on a father. I suspect same-sex parenting is more about adults’ wants than children’s needs.

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