McBLOG: Is “In Your Skin” in your child’s school?

Remember the good news from the end of last year? The Mates and Dates programme in schools which  had been indoctrinating harmful and confusing gender fluidity and sexuality ideology into our schools for far too long – was scrapped. But now there’s a new show in town – called In Your Skin. It’s a programme developed by two sexologists from Australia. We’ve investigated some of its content and ideology. Once again, you should be concerned.

The Mates and Dates programme in schools was an ACC programme for children 13 years up. – Now it was always sold as a programme around safe, healthy and respectful relationships, the harms of drugs and alcohol, and keeping safe together, what we found was that it was linked closely to the Ministry of Education’s Sexuality Education Curriculum, with a push on issues such as “identity, gender and sexuality”, use of the flawed and misleading ‘genderbread’ person, indoctrinating your children with – genderqueer, androgynous, bisexual, – breaking through the binary.

Fortunately, many many schools didn’t want a bar of it. And rightly so. They knew it was a flawed programe. 

Now there’s a new programme which has arrived on our shores – from Australia. It’s called Inyourskin and it’s been developed by two Australian sexologists.

They say that young people have voiced their preference for practical information about navigating respectful intimate relationships, particularly with respect to consent and communication skills.

Topics to be covered include: 

• develop healthy relationship skills

• identify personal values and relationships needs

• determine boundaries around preferred sexual activity

• communicate and negotiate sexual activity

• understand and identify coercion

• understand, express, and recognise consent

Preferred sexual activity. Negotiate sexual activity. 

Now we actually listened into a parent presentation which a number of parents had alerted us to. In fact, a number of teachers have also expressed concern about the programme which is being put into a select group of secondary schools at this stage.

What you HEAR is good. Consent. Problem with porn. Impact of alcohol. Respect. Healthy relationships. Just like Mates and Dates.

It’s when you dig deeper into the ideology and worldview of the programme that the red flags appears.

Now we actually contacted the presenters and asked if we could see the material going into schools.

Their response? 

We will not be sending you a copy of our program, I’m sorry, though we will soon be releasing a curriculum for Secondary School students which you will be able to purchase in due course. We are hoping this is ready for release in term 2. 

Yet they’re doing the programme this term. So why can’t parents see it? That’s an immediate red flag.

Some of their student workshops include:

Schools and Alternative Education Taking a gender transformative approach these workshops support young people to develop healthy relationship skills…

Expansive Practice This workshop explores the general experience of queer students, the harmful impact of the gender binary, expansive language and creating safe classrooms.

It becomes quickly evident that this programme, while containing some good material which parents will appreciate, has a strong emphasis on radical sexuality and gender ideologies – which is exactly what the Ministry of Education and activists want your children to be indoctrinated in.

And it is very evident when you look at their Instagram account – in fact, it’s a real eye opener. It quickly shows you their ideology behind the well-intentioned nice sounding sales pitch of their curriculum. By the way, some of this material I’m about to show you you may find offensive:

  1. want to experiment and explore your sexuality – what are you waiting for?
  2. virginity is a harmful construct
  3. the construct of virginity serves to police female sexuality. They go on to say “Virginity perpetuates a heteronormative context; it comes with a sexual double standard and assumes a gender binary.” What the??
  4. The concept of virginity is misleading and unhelpful. Instead of thinking about virginity, get busy making sure any partnered sexual activity is mutually consenting and mutually pleasurable.

Interestingly, during the parent meeting that we listened in on, they were asked – do they encourage abstinence. Yes of course. Absolutely. But It’s hard to find any evidence of this in the worldview. Remember, this is a sex positive, gender transformative, preferred sexual activity programme. “Instead of thinking about virginity, get busy….”

  1. This charming one comparing penises and testicles – they’re all normal
  2. Pansexual pride day
  3. International day of people with disability – for some reason they’re only in the LGBTQQIP2SAA+++ group for some reason
  4. Transgender awareness week
  5. International pronouns day
  6. International safe abortion day
  7. What is binding?
  8. They say “Binding (remember – this is a teenage girls breasts) can positively impact a person’s mental health, helping them to appear in a way that better aligns with their identity. To compress the chest, binders are designed to be worn snug while still allowing for full breathing capacity. There’s a lot of misinformation out there about binding and it’s potential to be an unsafe practice. Let’s consider how to do it safely.This is dangerous and harmful advice
  9. International non-binary people’s day
  10. Pronouns – there’s some there I didn’t know – along the bottom – fay faer, hyoom hoom
  11. What is heteronormativity – it assumes the gender binary
  12. International day against homophobia, biphobia, interphobia and transphobia. How many phobias are there?
  13. It’s masturbation may – yep, a whole month
  14. Pride flags
  15. International sex workers rights day – yep, pro prostitution. Is that respectful relationships??
  16. This charming one on masturbation
  17. The genderbread person
  18. Supporting a petition for government funding for transgender surgeries
  19. Ethical porn – yeah right, ethical porn is a myth. Consumers of “ethical” porn aren’t immune to effects of addiction and tolerance. Pornography is intrinsically unethical. The term “ethical” is nothing more than a false veneer that gives a sheen of legitimacy to the use of inherently exploitive material.

We can’t see the actual curriculum because they won’t actually show us – but it’s very evident what their worldview is.

It’s not only sex positive, gender transformative, preferred sexual activity programme, Instead of thinking about virginity, get busy…. It’s also pro abortion, pro gender confusion, pro transing and binding and sex change operations, and even pro prostitution. 

But what is also concerning is the websites that it links through to to back up its own material. which leaves nothing to the imagination, very explicit on issues you probably don’t want your child to hear about, very pro abortion. with lots of videos about gender identity and sexual orientation.

This site from the UK called and some highly offensive material on that site also.

An Australian site – with some… interesting…. Q Guides for young people. 

Planned parenthood website – yep they refer students to that!!

Beyond Blue which is similar to Insideout here in NZ.

Headspace which is an Australian government site and links through to the controversial Minus18 site

And a sexuality and disability website with some… interesting images on their home page.


Parents – Do you know what your school is doing in this area? Is “In Your Skin” in your school. We think you should check. It’s a good reminder that you need to go to our website and read our Parent Guide. It’s time to push back – and this Parent Guide shows you how to do it effectively and strategically.

They will hate this presentation that you’re watching – because they really don’t want you as a parent to be fully aware of what’s happening. That was pretty evident as we watched the parent presentation online recently.

As a parent or caregiver, it’s our job to be a voice our children trust the most on the topic of relationships and sex. Let’s be courageous and talk about sex & relationships & marriage & abstinence & respect & consent with our children. 

Be the loudest voice on this topic. 

Let’s not leave the door open for our children to be taught about sexuality and gender theory by the voices of people whose agendas and values don’t align with ours.

We’ll keep discussing this issue and giving you the resources to speak up and push back. 

Below are just some of the images and “messages” from the In Your Skin website and social channels.

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