McBLOG: “Theybies” – a pandemic of bonkers

In a new ‘pandemic of bonkers’, some parents are wanting to raise their children as not baby boys or baby girls but as “theybies” – what is known as “gender creative parenting”. These parents are deliberately keeping the sex of their babies top secret because they say the children themselves should be free to decide – as they grow up – who they are. The good news is that while the media try and push the whole “theybies” thing, it’s not really catching on to most normal thinking parents. You just can’t quite get around the little issue of…. biology.


“Theybies” – a ‘pandemic of bonkers’

Sunday programme always works hard to push a radical social engineering narrative – not presenting the debate – but generally pushing a one sided view – euthanasia, abortion, conversion therapy, surrogacy, transgendering children with puberty blockers, drug testing, saving the baby by not having babies – and recently they were back – this time with Theybies.

Although to be fair, it’s actually an old story – one that most people ignore because it illustrates what a friend of mine lovingly refers to as “a pandemic of bonkers”.

In the recent Sunday programme it was about “Theybies”.

“A boy or a girl? It’s usually been quick and easy for parents to describe their newborn baby. But a growing group of mums and dads are embracing what is known as “gender creative parenting”. These parents are deliberately keeping the sex of their babies top secret because they say the children themselves should be free to decide – as they grow up – who they are. They’re a new generation being raised not as baby boys or baby girls, but as theybies.

But before we look at Sunday’s programme which was actually a rebroadcast of an Australian 60 Minutes episode, we can actually go all the way back to 2011

And to Canada (no surprise) to find a Canadian couple who was keeping their child’s gender secret. When the Toronto Star first profiled Storm and her family in 2011, they turned heads the world over. Parents Kathy Witterick and David Stocker had decided not to publicly reveal the sex of their third child… The Toronto-based couple wanted to let Storm decide in her own time what gender she wanted to identify with.

Fastforward to 2016 and an update on the family.

Their eldest child Jazz, 10, explains the difference. “Sex is what is between your legs, and gender is what you think of yourself as a person,” says Jazz. All three of the Stocker-Witterick children were given a choice of gender identity. Now 5-and-a-half years old, Storm confidently says her preferred pronoun is “she.”

… Interview requests poured in from around the world – from NBC, National Geographic, 60 Minutes Australia, Anderson Cooper, Dr. Phil and the Oprah Winfrey Network.

….Kathy [the mum] works in education and training and supports queer and transgender family programs. David [the dad] still teaches Grades 7 and 8 at the City View Alternative Senior School during the year… The couple continues to unschool their kids, a version of homeschooling where the young ones direct lessons based on what they hope to learn. Jazz [10] prefers the pronouns “she” and “her.” She identifies as a transgender girl, having begun her transition three days before she turned 7. Kio, 7, identifies as non-binary and uses the pronoun “they.” [Mum] also opts for “they,” while [Dad] uses “he or they.”

And then another family not to be outdone were the Myers.

In 2018, the media were focused on Kyl Myers – who also we will see features in the Sunday programme.

Kyl Myers saw the reports around the Canadian couple, and Myers is now the parent of a 2-year-old theyby, Zoomer. But here’s the key. Myers was a gender-studies student at the University of Utah at the time, and because of this she said she understood gender to be not a biological imperative but rather a social construct.

According to a media report by The Independent in the UK

Long before Kyl Myers ever gave birth, she knew she wanted her child to be a “theyby,” or a baby raised without the construct of gender. Speaking to The Cut, Myers described the moment she realised as a gender-studies student at the University of Utah that gender was a social construct – one that she did not want to impose this on her future child.

“Sure, there are biological differences among the sexes, I get that. But once I was exposed to it, I couldn’t unsee or unlearn that gender is a social construction,” Myers recalled.

And when Myers did give birth, two years ago, to ‘theyby’ Zoomer, she and her partner were adamant that Zoomer grows up in an environment free of gender stereotypes – where their child could come to an understanding of their own gender in their own time….

….When Myers gave birth to Zoomer, she decided to keep their anatomy a secret from Zoomer’s grandparents so they would realise Myers was serious about her decision and her dedication to raising her child this way – and so they would become comfortable using the correct pronouns.

Myers told The Cut: ”So many of the root causes of health outcomes are related to gender, not sex,” 

Um, well, not if you’re talking about prostate cancer, breast cancer, ovarian and cervical cancer, pregnancy issues, Rett syndrome, menopause, testicular cancer, etc etc – all biological sex-specific health issues.

You can follow Zoomer’s life at Look – this is nothing about showcasing an ideology or making the child a public display, or pushing a narrative by the parents. No of course not.

But also in 2018, there were Massachusetts three-year-old twins Zyler and Kadyn Sharpe. According to a report by NBC, ‘Boy or girl?’ Parents raising ‘theybies’ let kids decide. One way of shielding children from gender stereotypes: Keep their biological sex secret.

Is Zyler a boy or a girl? How about Kadyn? That’s a question their parents, Nate and Julia Sharpe from Massachusetts, say only the twins can decide.

Have a watch.

They don’t notice they’re different. Um boys have a penis, Girls have a ….. Yep, kids talk. Kids compare. Kids can see. They’re not dumb. This is just confusing them.

And I wonder if mummy can feel like she’s daddy – and does she need to inform the kids so they don’t call her mumma any more? Just asking. Interestingly the article goes on to say:

Experts say this is happening mostly in progressive, well-to-do enclaves. But what makes this “gender-open” style of parenting stand out, and even controversial in some circles, is that the parents do not reveal the sex of their children to anyone. Even the children, who are aware of their own body parts and how they may differ from others, are not taught to associate those body parts with being a boy or girl. If no one knows a child’s sex, these parents theorize, the child can’t be pigeonholed into gender stereotypes. This type of parenting received widespread attention in 2011, when a Toronto couple announced that they were raising their child, Storm, without gender designation, sparking a media frenzy. 

The article says

When the Sharpes arrived at the hospital for the delivery, they asked the staff not to announce the twins’ sex. Even after the newborns were put in their arms, their anatomy remained a mystery for several hours.

Dr. John Steever, assistant professor of pediatrics at the Mount Sinai Adolescent Health Center in New York, sees gender-open parenting as a way to show children that they will be accepted no matter their identity.

And just before we check out the Sunday programme, yet another recent story on this – as recently as 2021.

We’re Raising Our Kids With No Gender | MY EXTRAORDINARY FAMILYwas featured on the Truly youtube channel – which seems to be a sort-of video version of Women’s Weekly – “the home of incredible real-life stories”.

And this one has an added twist. The parents are not two – it’s three. Yep!

A throuple [from Orlando, Florida] are bringing up their two-year-old baby as ‘theyby’, a term that refers to gender neutral parenting where the baby isn’t outwardly identified by its parents as either a boy or a girl. Baby Sparrow follows in the footsteps of their 10-year-old sibling, Hazel, who was initially brought up as a girl but came out themselves as non-binary aged just four. Hazel and Sparrow are looked after by three parent figures: Ari, Gwendolyn and Brynnifer, who themselves are either non-binary and/or transgender. 

Ken – embed video


You’ll notice in all these cases what Canadian expert Dr Kenneth Zucker refers to as “family noise”. Kenneth Zucker in his work has found that gender dysphoric behaviour and identity in children cannot be addressed without looking at “family noise”. GID seldom manifests in a child isolated from other factors, particularly those existing within the family dynamic. This is strongly verified when observing the family interactions of such children as well as their parent’s reaction to these children.

You can see some of that “family noise” in all those stories we’ve just watched. Transgender themselves. Gender studies academic. Educator, trainer and supporter of queer and transgender family programs etc

So finally to the Sunday programme – which as you can see, isn’t really breaking new ground with this story on “theybies”. In fact, it’s an old story with very little traction – hopefully,

Theybies: letting young children choose their own gender from 60 Minutes Australia

The parents said that the assumptions we put on Evie (9) as a girl is a problem. So with Birdie – we won’t tell people  their sex. But Evie is a well developed normal girl. What’s the actual issue here?

And then to our “expert” – it’s our gender-studies academic from the University of Utah – the guru, apparently,

Kyl Myers says “The reproductive anatomy that my kiddo was born with, I didn’t want to assign too many labels, assumptions, and destinies.” And binary is more confusing because 8 billion people fit into 2 boxes yep, male and female. Just as we were created.

Binary isn’t confusing. Ignoring biological reality is what really causes confusion.

Finally our Aussie couple again. “Parents who want their child to be a footballer but they want to dance. Wants to play with dolls.”

Um… that’s the parents’ issue. Nothing to do with non-binary or choosing gender.

Ken – embed video

What all these parents fail to acknowledge is that male and female are natural and humanly universal realities.  There simply are not many genders. But of course, there are many different ways to be a healthy male or female without holding to narrow gender stereotypes.

In fact, very few people actually hold to absolute gender-distinct stereotypes in practicality, evidenced by how they act. It is neither enlightened or loving parenting to pretend we can just let our children decide which gender they want to be. It is nothing less than ideological and can be harmful.

But the good news is that while the media try and push the whole “theybies” thing, it’s not really catching on like they’d hope it would.

You just can’t quite get around this little issue – biology.

Ken – embed video

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